Dave Grohl, Jane's Addiction, Linkin Park & The Science of Fatal Mistakes

We all knew we'd/they'd fail...but never quite so spectacularly. But why now, and why are the how's so painfully similar? A primer in generational flameouts.

Me, on top of the world. Also Me: scant minutes before it all came crumbling down.

The Haitians have been getting screwed over since AIDS when, for some reason, they got name checked as one of the diseases’ early vectors. Stand-up comedians routinely roast them for suffering while sharing an island with the better-heeled Dominican Republic, conveniently forgetting that France has had a hard-on for Haiti ever since the slave rebellion that marked the beginning of the great French slide into global insignificance.

France has fucked Haiti and now presidential contender Donald Trump is picking up where the US loan guarantees that were sucked up by the Duvaliers left off: Haitians, according to the diaper wearing former president’s false claims, are eating cats and dogs.

And yet…this is not about that. Not at all, because as obsessions go this past week that wasn’t the one that occupied the mind. Not by a stretch.

This week, unbidden by most, the Dave Grohl infidelity story forced its way in, backed quickly by the Linkin Park new-singer-rapist-supporter pick, and rounded out with the Jane’s Addiction onstage fistfight story, all of a piece, enough to get you wondering: what the fuck?

Sure I laughed initially when years ago the Dead Kennedys were actively destroying their legacy by taking their infighting outside and suing each other in court. When Greg Ginn and whatever trailings of Black Flag were doing the same while Bad Brains consistently and continually sabotaged what could have been shining moment after shining moment for, what ended up being serious health issues.

Grohl, who some had mistakenly glossed as “the nicest guy in rock and roll” had apparently cheated on his wife and impregnated another woman who, in an excess of great strategic thinking, carried the meal ticket kid full term….

And despite writing “How Low Can a Punk Get?” Bad Brains’ response to the self-destructive punk legacy set out by the Sex Pistols and the glue-huffing Ramones, it caught Bad Brains too, and as a second generation punk (I first heeded the call in 1977 courtesy of the first generation Spungen stabbing and relentless headlines about this “dangerous” thing happening on New York’s Bowery), I wondered how they had stumbled so badly.

Right up until this week.

Grohl, who some had mistakenly glossed as “the nicest guy in rock and roll” had apparently cheated on his wife and impregnated another woman who, in an excess of great strategic thinking, carried the meal ticket kid full term. Why he needed to explain this to the rest of the world was just Public Relations 101 regarding getting out ahead of story before the story gets out ahead of you.

Of course this was greeted by a raft of folks connecting him to porn stars and other winked at cases of infidelity. As though infidelity was the full measure of the man. Though when it’s the “nicest man in rock and roll” I guess it’s to be expected. Then, in an effort to help, the distaff side of his friendship convoy came out in defense of. A great instinct but very much akin to the asking of the question, have you stopped beating your wife yet? The look has gone from bad to worse.

Linkin Park, a band I always thought sucked, squandered whatever good will they had accrued from their singer’s suicide by picking a woman singer (which was a total feather in the cap) who had showed up to Scientologist Rapist Danny Masterson’s trial to “support” the Scientologist Rapist (a total black eye). Defeat from the jaws of victory. What was the band thinking?!? Exactly.

And finally the totally confusing Jane’s Addiction onstage fistfight where according to reports Farrell attacked guitarist Dave Navarro for playing “too loud” which had been causing him problems with his voice as he tried to overcompensate vocally. This baffled the most as stage sound is usually controlled by someone on the side of the stage, not Navarro, but whatever: this flameout was public, unprofessional in the extreme and in tennis terms a totally unforced error.

Moreover the list of generational fellow travelers existed in plain sight right under our noses. Swans’ Michael Gira, Daughters’ Alexis Marshall, the uncomfortable change of the guard in the Sonic Youth household with (full disclosure) friend and known associate Thurston Moore and, of course, closer to home OXBOW’s summertime self-immolation.

Most men I know in bands would fuck, if given the opportunity, many more men/women than their female counterparts. This could explain the How of it all. But not so much the WHY. So why, The Why?

One time might be considered an accident. This many public stumbles though begs for analysis and the analysis, bereft as it is with any major female offenders (excepting possibly Cathy Pellow formerly with Sargent House), might make you think this is just a man thing. I don’t that’s it though. Most men I know in bands would fuck, if given the opportunity, many more men/women than their female counterparts. This could explain the How of it all. But not so much the WHY. So why, The Why?

Well, The WHY of it all starts to congeal around age though. Age, and intimations of mortality. And this is the Columbo moment of discovery when Peter Falk scratches his head and wonders aloud what he already knows the answer to: what men in their 20s are self-owning so aggressively? Despite asking a room full of music fans, not one could think of any 20-something screw-ups.

No. The names that came up, pre-punk rock, from Eric Clapton, Roger Waters, Jimmy Page to post-punk rock Rammstein, Marilyn Manson and the Red Hot Chili Peppers, all seem to point to men of a certain age…”fucking” up. But “fucking” up seems to adjudge that qualitatively there were BETTER ways to do something, a concept that makes me laugh.

There ARE better ways to fall down a flight of stairs, none of them ultimately “good” but more importantly this can’t just be about good vs bad. Nothing that is human should be foreign to us and so being surprised that a guy in a band, even a “nice” guy like Grohl, had sexual contact with someone who was interested in having sexual contact with a guy in a band, regardless of this guy in the band’s marital status, should really surprise no one.

But isn’t this just the exculpatory “boys will be boys” defense?

Yes. And no. Like Bukowski once said, and I’m paraphrasing here, if you think I’m crazy why does everything have locks on it? Human nature seems to dictate that in regards to human motives and motivations things that make us feel good/better will get done before things that don’t. Even if the long term implications will level the good v bad deal.

So all of this performative shock that someone did something human needs to stop. Save the outrage for the criminal. But when it comes to the personal (and non-criminal)? Those of you who haven’t done the obvious please line up to cast the first stone.

To the rest of youse/us…mind your own business.

Side note to guys in bands of a certain age: when you hit “middle” age, if you’re still making music be mindful of the fact that stressors will start to suggest the formerly unthinkable without you even noticing it. Proceed with caution and know that being mindful of not being a cliche is not the same as avoiding being that cliche.

Now get out there. Don’t hurt anyone, physically, or do anything stupid/criminal. And please, for the love of G-d, stay out of the news for easily avoided issues.

Making musical art is that important.

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