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Matthew Fox Morning Meditation

Memorial Day 2023: From Self-Hatred to Self-Love & Spreading Love

Otto Rank’s profound insight that a “philosophy of pessimism” is born of self-hatred gives us a deep understanding of the origin of much suffering in the world–but also a door to the way out of this suffering. If the door into the suffering of self-hatred often comes from abuse of many kinds, then the way out is to find goodness around us that elicits the love that is a response to goodness. Much self-hatred is perpetuated, as Rank points out, by our overactive imaginations, the “artiste-manque,” the creativity we invest in beating up on ourselves.

This we are prone to do of course in a culture that is based on competition more than co-operation, a culture therefore that has taken the basic dynamics of capitalism “to heart” as one says, that is, as a foundational way to look at the world and even at oneself.

“The survival of the fittest” meaning the meanest–not, unfortunately the survival of the fittest meaning “those who fit in well, who adapt, who recover, who forgive (including forgiving oneself).”

The self-hatred that births more hatred can be found in the destructive childhood of Adolf Hitler whose father beat him daily, as psychologist Alice Miller has demonstrated. We all know how that turned out. The abuse of the last president’s Ku Klux Klan honoring father explains a lot of recent history as well.

When Julian of Norwich talks about God as “the goodness in nature and things” and how we are all born with “joy as our birthright,” she is clearly offering another way to look at the world and look at ourselves.

When Thomas Aquinas tells us that “wonder makes joy” and Webb Telescope is daily filling our souls with an ever-deepening story of the wonders of our universe and planet on which we all live, abundant joy should be in motion.

We are invited beyond anthropocentric self-doubt and wrongs done us by parents, society or Patriarchy that brings with it “fatalistic self-hatred” as Adrienne Rich reminds us to the graced community of the more-than-human. From self-hatred to Self-love meaning self-connected-to-the-whole.

If a pessimistic philosophy causes self-hatred, then true self-love, self in the context of the whole, can cause a blessing-oriented philosophy. A rediscovery of the Original Blessing that earth, cosmos and we all are is medicine for self-hatred.

Memorial Day remembers those who put Self ahead of self; and love ahead of fascism.

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most narcissists I know, me included, really love themselves though. So maybe self-love is not the issue. I'd just settle for a little kindness all around.

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Admittedly got lazy copy/pasting spiritual post from Facebook feed. Was never a Tina Turner fan but am impressed and excited that she indeed wore a wig. Have you listened to Paul Levi's wetiko virus talks or read his books? Yesterday encountered Wetiko in my own psyche while on a hair raising journey. Showed up as toxic fear and sickness, ego clinging and panicked sense of separation from life. Thought I was gonna die. Made calls to my family in the middle of the night. Was entirely convinced this was the last moment of my wretched mortal life. Then as the demonic dancing slowed I remembered the mainly nice well intentioned creative acts that comprise my history, interrupted here and there of course by the irresistible delights of greed hate and delusion. Had a little cry and then laughed and went about cleaning up the mess. Viewed through a Wetiko lens with a dash of course in miracles Tina Turner transcended the forces and voices that conspired to destroy her. She met the haters and raised them in creative accomplishment. Trump is the embodiment of hate, and if there is such thing as a mind virus that makes us scapegoat and devalue each other into easy reducible categories he's captured that energy epically. So how to respond to the forces of unadulterated hate in the lead to 2024? Don't bite the hook. Design fun house mirrors to remind one another how shitting on your neighbor makes you look, and feel. When I was but a lad i worshipped killdozer. Still do. Didn't understand at the time how they captured the poetic beauty of narcissistic psychopathy and turned it back on the sick soulless corporate death scape. Michael Gerald has in fact always been kind and accepting toward me even though my childish mind regarded him as frightening and unreachable, kinda like you. So thanks for continuing to provoke the kind of medicine the world desperately deserves. Gotta go through it to get to it.

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I like "getting through it". I also like "blowing the whole clambake". By which I mean when the going gets tough? Quitting. So long America. Call me when you're OK.

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The stinking thinking as I see it is falling for the easy lie of western psychiatric medicine which peddles all-or-nothing totalizing distortions. More then a few friends and acquaintances of mine have lately ended up in in patient clinics where they are automatically stuffed like foie gras geese with lithium and other SRI chemicals, neatly reduced to DSM categories then eventually released to return to self medicating practices because really the untreated monster under the bed is Shame. The trauma-informed treatment that actually delivers and even might heal the patient is the multiplicity model of internal family systems or similar approaches. It's the approach we need to learn and offer our young people, deranged and depressed from the greedy ravages of algorithms designed to hook, distort and alienate reality. One element of the unfolding American waking nightmare is our collective allegiance to distorted thinking. We scapegoat shame and blame because we fear our inner totalizing totalitarians. The issue is projection. My inner saint seeks to be of service to the world and does so beautifully. If my 13 yr old narcissist sub personality desires expression I fuck my boyfriend extra hard and maybe throw him around a little. It beats jumping ship or getting in trouble for saying or doing something regrettable.

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